Recognizing both the positive and negative events in our lives requires humility — the kind of humility that allows us to accept that we don’t have to have it all figured out, and that there’s always room to grow. Humility keeps us grounded when things go well, reminding us to be grateful rather than prideful. It also gives us the strength to face the hard truths without excuses or blame. When we humbly examine both our wins and our setbacks, we gain clarity, develop character, and build the kind of resilience that lasts. Life becomes less about proving we’re perfect and more about becoming better, one honest step at a time.

Does seeing the difference between right and wrong, good decisions and bad decisions, - something that works and something that doesn’t work, mean you have to sacrifice something you want for something you don’t want? First, the difference is determining if what is in front of you is a want or a need. When it comes to working out, is it easier, as a need to rest on your couch, or do you need to create a habit and a mindset that changes your persevering personality? When hard work or inconvenient issues present themselves, do we groan for hours, or do we stand up and get to work? Eliminate the emotional need to moan and groan. Say to yourself, ‘STOP’, ‘I do not need to whine, just move your body!’

Wants are so much easier to fall into than chasing a need. Wants will only be those pleasurable things in life that are easy and satisfying. Needs start out as just the opposite. Success means chasing the needs, because common sense tells you which works, which doesn’t, for the long term for your future self. Eventually, your want for success will match your needs.

It is strength conditioning to turn the negatives into success.
 

So now we see both the positive and the negative side of a situation. We can focus on the negative and let it bring us down, where we let it put us in a position where we are stuck, not moving forward, and not doing anything but staring off into space, reliving each moment of failure again and again. Some of us get to a point where we become numb and unfeeling.

Course correction! Hold onto a sheet of paper or notebook that we grab often, somewhere it spells out the mind shift that needs to occur.

We write down successful solutions that we can adhere to, when we are slowing down. When the negative hits us and overwhelms us, read this sheet of words you put together, such as:

1. This situation I am going through is temporary.
   
2. What I am going through was meant to teach me.
3. I fell on my back, I am looking up so I can get up.
4. It is over when I say it is over – And I am not finished.
5. I am stronger than my problem.

On this paper should be those words that resonate with you. You know they are true. You read them because, in a moment of weakness, you forgot.

Don’t fight back, fight forward!

It’s important to recognize our struggles. It can highlight our weaknesses, our shortfalls, and energy missing, in order to build ourselves up and be more successful.  If we need more training, education, or hands-on experience, we will know what we need and can now gain the experience required to move forward. When we determined that working out was necessary, it was because of what was lacking. Poor health, potential for poor health, poor mental focus, and growing old in itself is enough of a reason for us to keep a lifestyle of working out.

It is even more powerful to recognize what is going well. What strengths, efforts, progress, and the strong, unbreakable character you possess? Seeing our strengths gives us motivation to push harder. The positive gives us hope and the power, the momentum, and the confidence to keep battling for more. An accumulation of small wins adds up to bigger victories.

What you accomplished right now with your workout should be celebrated as a victory for today, and pushing for more tomorrow!

If we had a choice, would we choose to spend time thinking about what went right or what went wrong? Would we choose to even see what is broken, things that fell apart, things that went bad, and make you feel as though those bad things made you look weak? Maybe we would or have said at this point, “I will deal with it tomorrow”. If you're tired and exhausted, by all means, create a later time that you can readdress your issue. Don’t try to fix when you are tired; it will only frustrate you even more and possibly do more damage.

When we ignore the negative fears, bad habits, and limiting beliefs, they grow stronger in the dark. Identifying the negative is not about complaining or being hard on yourself. It’s about being real enough to face the things that keep us stuck. In martial arts, we call that self-discipline. In life, it’s called maturity.

Think about your growth. When do you really grow, when everything goes right? When everything goes according to plan, it means that your decision has not been challenged to reveal any weaknesses in your idea or plan. When things break, that’s when you see vulnerable points, breaking points that will cause your plan to fail.

Welcome your failures as though you have reached a privileged point of growth.